Do you know the panda joke? It's one of my favorites.
A panda walks into a bar orders a sandwich which he eats with much gusto then stands up and shoots the waiter. The bartender, all perturbed asks the panda, "Why did you do that?"
The panda says, "I'm a panda."
"So?!"
"So look it up," the panda says and then leaves.
The bartender googles on his cell phone the word panda and it says about pandas, "Eats shoots and leaves."
bud-daum-bumm.
Randy
· 1 year ago
OMG(osh) that was so stupid. I LOVED It.
B.T.Carolus
· 1 year ago
"Eats shoots and leaves"
That's the name of a book about grammar!!! :-)
ChaplianChas.
· 1 year ago
Believe it or not, never heard this before! Believe it or not, I'm likely to use it!
hal_p
· 1 year ago
I pray tomorrow is better for you!
Randy
· 1 year ago
thanks ... and a lot less expensive ($255 on my car :( )
amy
· 1 year ago
A blonde was shopping at Target and came across a shiny silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took it to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "Why, that's a thermos..... it keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold." "Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing....I' m going to buy it!!" So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk. "What's that," he asked? "Why, that's a thermos. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied. Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?" The blond replied, "Two popsicles and some coffee."
Randy
· 1 year ago
Silly Blond ... Great Joke... thanks Amy!
B.T.Carolus
· 1 year ago
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to a pro-football game. After it was over he asked her how she liked it. She replied, "Well, it was ok, but it seemed like a lot of trouble to go to over twenty-five cents." Her boyfriend was confused and asked her to explain what she meant. She answered, "At the beginning they tossed a quarter, and then for the whole rest of the game everyone kept shouting 'get the quarter back! get the quarter back!'"
Those are FANTASTIC....by far my favorite videos this year.
ChaplianChas.
· 1 year ago
Especially liked the second one!
amy
· 1 year ago
here's another one.
Two blondes were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house. Carol, who was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you throwing those nails away?" Carol explained, "When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw them away." Donna got completely upset and yelled, "You moron! Those nails aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!"
Randy
· 1 year ago
Well I am glad Donna knocked some sense into Carol. Sheesh, *everyone* knows that.
amy
· 1 year ago
I'm glad you are feeling better. You are in my prayers. :)
Randy
· 1 year ago
thanks!
Stacy Harp
· 1 year ago
How about reading Philippians 4:8 to get your mind off your worries.
Randy
· 1 year ago
Hmmmm...
Philippians 4:8 " 8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
Can I think on all that and still get a good hearty chuckle out of it?
Jonathan
· 1 year ago
Absolutely!
Janey
· 1 year ago
The youtube video's were funny, I must admit.
Randy
· 1 year ago
don't forget to hit reply underneath specific comments to leave a comment in line with the original.
editorgal
· 1 year ago
Umm, I'd love to help, really and truly I would. But since I am a blonde joke, I can't remember the punch lines, or if I can remember the punch line I can't remember the set-up.
I did try to open my Explorer's door with my office fob the other day. It took several minutes for me to realize that waving my fob at the car door wasn't working and to fish my car keys off of their leash. After I got in the car, I remembered my ancient 1995 car doesn't have a keyless entry anyway . . . what was I thinking?!
Glad your headache is better.
Randy
· 1 year ago
Thanks ... but what's a fob? :)
editorgal
· 1 year ago
It's this gray thingy on a stretchy wrist deal that I wave at a darker gray box on the outer doors of my office, when the light turns green, I can open the door. Like a key card.
Sigh. I did sleep at a Holiday Inn Express this summer.
Randy
· 1 year ago
OH... that's cool.
B.T.Carolus
· 1 year ago
That's sounds confusing/complicated. I'm glad I don't work at your office.
editorgal
· 1 year ago
I'm a legal administrator at a law firm . . . lots of priveleged stuff, bank records, etc. Don't want unauthorized folks just wandering around willy-nilly. Plus, it makes me feel safer when I have to work late, on those rare occasions I have to be here after 6 or so. Crazy, huh, ditzy blonde a legal administrator . . . how did that happen?!
B.T.Carolus
· 1 year ago
I'm still glad that I don't (and never will) work somewhere where it's necessary to have complicated entry/exit systems. I would lock myself in on accident, and die of starvation after eating paper because I was hallucinating due to lack of water.
But I am glad that you're glad that you have one.
editorgal
· 1 year ago
LOL! Which is why the security guys know me by name . . . I have to call on them A LOT!
ChaplianChas.
· 1 year ago
So the other day, a Barber/ Rabbi/ Priest/ Lawyer/ Judge/ and a duck walk into a bar. The bartender then says, "What is this? A Joke?"
Another day two guys walked into a bar, and the third guy ducked!
So, a week ago, this guy walks into a bar ----- and it really hurt!
Randy
· 1 year ago
That's really good
amy
· 1 year ago
You are probably feeling much better today but I thought you might like a good laugh tonight.
All Comments
A panda walks into a bar orders a sandwich which he eats with much gusto then stands up and shoots the waiter. The bartender, all perturbed asks the panda, "Why did you do that?"
The panda says, "I'm a panda."
"So?!"
"So look it up," the panda says and then leaves.
The bartender googles on his cell phone the word panda and it says about pandas, "Eats shoots and leaves."
bud-daum-bumm.
That's the name of a book about grammar!!! :-)
"Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing....I' m going to buy it!!"
So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk. "What's that," he asked?
"Why, that's a thermos. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied.
Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"
The blond replied, "Two popsicles and some coffee."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjEpGRCmGns
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jkRSmvNkZ8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4NCJxJ-jxM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXT3Sma4-rg
Two blondes were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house. Carol, who was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in. Donna, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, "Why are you throwing those nails away?"
Carol explained, "When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw them away."
Donna got completely upset and yelled, "You moron! Those nails aren't
defective! They're for the other side of the house!"
Can I think on all that and still get a good hearty chuckle out of it?
I did try to open my Explorer's door with my office fob the other day. It took several minutes for me to realize that waving my fob at the car door wasn't working and to fish my car keys off of their leash. After I got in the car, I remembered my ancient 1995 car doesn't have a keyless entry anyway . . . what was I thinking?!
Glad your headache is better.
Sigh. I did sleep at a Holiday Inn Express this summer.
But I am glad that you're glad that you have one.
Another day two guys walked into a bar, and the third guy ducked!
So, a week ago, this guy walks into a bar ----- and it really hurt!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpaaLf7fTaM&feat...
Joel Osteen ministries [Jokes].. very funny!